Friday, January 8, 2010

January Sixth and Seventh

Do you see the little critter? He is on the corner of the fence eating a morsel.
I opened the door to try to take a better picture and I scared him so he started to leave.

He is gone now. He took care of himself but will not be afraid to return.

It occurred to me, as I was loading these pictures this morning, that our emotions are much the same. They show up, sometimes, like the squirrel, unexpectedly. Sometimes they are happy emotions and sometimes they are sad. I have known this in the past but am relearning that my power comes in allowing myself to feel them, give into the sadness, cry if need be and then-----------eventually, like the squirrel, they will be gone and I can move along.

When I arrived on the fifth we went to ElRancho for supper. This is the restaurant where Misty, the girl who "informs" Maria if she has seen Amber out or heard anything about her.
Randy, Chandler and I ended up having a great discussion about emotions and feelings. We did not speak specifically about Amber but rather about handling emotions and situations in general. It was the first time really that he has been open or willing to have this type of conversation. SMILE!

Day before yesterday we had a review counseling session with Kay, Chandler's counselor. Maria was included via phone since she was sick. Chandler had also gotten his report card. He had gone from a needs improvement ( that is the term I am using ) to an excellent in accepting responsibility for his behavior.
The session was a great one. Maria brought up Chandler's upcoming birthday on the 13th and what to do if Amber showed up.----I do not think she will show up at all----my personal opinion----- BUT we formulated a plan of Chandler spending the night with us since Maria is not as strong concerning Amber as we are. I reminded Maria that the police should be called immediately if Amber ever did show up as there is a warrant out for her arrest.
Kay, thank you, thank you, thank you, Kay----asked Chandler if he understood why we would need to call the police. He shook his head no. Kay then explained to him about the warrant and that we could get in trouble for being accomplices if we did not take that action. She told him it wasn't because we wanted to call the police, it was because we needed to call the police.
Passive Aggressive behavior was brought up and Maria told Kay she wanted Chandler growing up knowing counseling was a good thing. She wanted him to learn not to hold stuff inside and then blow up, when unable to hold it anymore, like she does. She mentioned she knew I thought she needed counseling and she agreed with me.
Kay said," So if we can get you fixed up all will be good?"
Now I just wish, as I have been wishing for a very long time, Maria would find a counselor and go to counseling.

Just like I know I need to get more exercise and I need to do something about it!!!!

We are now working on not having petty arguments with Chandler. He likes to argue about petty things. We have a symbol to use, like a time out sign, at the start of one of these arguments. So far it is working. Smile.

So, we have another review in two months and I am tickled that we all, including Chandler, like the counselor and we are all being helped by him being helped.

Did you see the game?
National Championship between Texas and Alabama?
I, for one, am not a football person
guess who is--
and guess who graduated from the University of Texas
and guess who was distraught when in the second series of the game
senior quarterback, Colt McCoy, got injured and was out for his last college football performance in the most important game of the season.
there was the freshman quarterback Shipley that had to come in and take over for Colt, one of the very best quarterbacks in the college football arena.
My heart was concerned for him. The pressure--- The challenge---The fear
this young man must have been feeling--
and at first it showed somewhat--
the team got it together and made a great come back
to the point they actually had a chance of winning the game at the end
only 3 points behind
we were holding our breath
it was exciting
it was intense
and then
turnover and touch down by other team.
Texas had never lost to Alabama before--

I always, even when my team wins, feel remorse for the team that lost. I think it might be why I am not a big competitor. You know, I had never even thought of this before--
but there it is-
I don't like for someone to have to lose.
I want everyone to feel good--
and this is unrealistic in any arena of life.
The feel of winning is obviously worth the feel of defeat for many a character-
I would rather everyone just play for the fun of it.
Although, I must admit
that Waterford trophy is mighty appealing---

You can see the intensity on his face, can't you?
He changed into his Texas shirt right before the game started to show his support.

Yesterday, after school, Randy was working with me on my business books. We were balancing my check book, with the bank, with my computer business program. Chandler was waiting for Randy to help him with math homework. While he waited he practiced his signature. He said he was figuring out what he wanted it to look like when he got a checkbook.

I can remember practicing my signature once upon a time.
Can You?

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