Monday, April 13, 2009

Monday Edition

Looks Like the Easter Bunny Brought Some Smiles

The Last Picture I have of Mom and Dad together

The snow is melted but I still have the fire going in the fireplace. I imagine I should let it go out today. I will have to talk to my husband about the weather. I am not a big weather channel fan. 

The Easter bunny left me a lovely gift yesterday. My dad chose no feeding tube for my mother and had the Dr. place a DNR in her file. She was moved out of  I.C.U. into a more comfortable setting. This morning my husband will be visiting the mortuary, gathering information on cremation and plots. Then my dad and Randy will go to the hospital to meet with Hospice. The Dr. that talked to Randy and my dad is one of the heroes in my life right now. Randy said he had never heard a Dr. do a better job communicating, in a loving way. My mother did indeed suffer a very bad stoke on her left side. The Dr. told my dad Hospice will be immediately involved and will explain the options for my mother being moved to another facility or being moved back home to transition from this earth to heaven. 
I have come to terms with doing whatever it is my dad chooses to do with my mom's remains. I was reminded by my dear Suzanne, as even I have said over and over again to others, my mom will not be in that body. She will be gone. It really makes no difference what my dad does. Earlier, it was not the literal act that bothered me. It was him not honoring her wishes. I am glad I have told my husband, many times, do whatever it is that is easiest for you. I am choosing cremation but if it does not work for you---my wish is your wish. And so it is in my mind I have decided they were together for 66 years. He is the one left on this earth so whatever is easiest for him I will honor.

Blessings to each of you-


Chia said...

I'm glad to read that you have found peace in this situation. I think your mothers spirit will smile at you knowing you have found a way to let go as she will be letting go. I hope the near future will hold calm and peacefulness for both you and your mother.

I like that you have spoken with your husband about doing whatever is best for hi, I hadn't even thought of this as I always tell my husband to have me cremated (after pulling all the gold teeth of course LOL). Now I feel a bit foolish having overlooked such an important part of this. I've always felt that memorials and funerals were for the living, not the dead, so how could I have forgotten to take the focus off me and give it to who survives me? Thank you for the nudge, it has had a profound effect on my long term view.

CeCe said...

It sounds like we have much in common when it comes to funerals, at least. Since you frequent Mystic Paper and watch American Idol, I am sure there is more. Smile. I want to express my gratitude to you for letting me know something I have written has been helpful to you. I write, as I write, for my own healing and the hope that somehow, someway, my words will be helpful to another. You have just affirmed that hope for me. Thank you!